im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
