so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
