I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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