Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
