So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
