is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
These tits shall not be calmed
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
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