South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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