I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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