he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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