How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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