This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
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