Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
