Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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