Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
