My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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