"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
When are your genitals available?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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