areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
