I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
