That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
