There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
