Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Randomize
