We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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