i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize