Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
