you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
