So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
one two three fourrrrnication!
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
Randomize
