We won't sleep together?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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