does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
