Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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