idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
