Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
