Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
