He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize