We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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