your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
