new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
