I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize
