i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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