it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
