Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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