I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize