READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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