My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
