apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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