stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
i think my cat just said my name.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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