Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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