you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
