found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
soo... how was my night?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
