1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
