what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
